Topic: Lucia Senima- Denied

[Lucia Senima]

First and Last Name: Lucia Senima
Bloodline: Half-Blood
Hair Color: Cocoa Brown
Eye Color: Hazelly green
General Build: Average
Height: Tall
Birthplace:  Riverside, Cardiff
Brief Childhood History:  Lucia, aka "Clover" lived in a bit of both worlds with her pureblood father, Muggle mother, and little sister. She had good chunks of knowledge from each of these "worlds" and worked hard to make sure they didn't collide. She was a tomboy, and enjoyed playing with the neighborhood guys.
 As a small child, Clover was fascinated by magic on her father's side, and often was told stories at bedtime about Quidditch, and other magical feats. One day, when she was caught trying to fly on one of her mom's brooms, and was asked by her parents why, Clover explained she wanted to be part of the Holyhead Harpies. When her father broke to her that her name didn't start with G, Clover replied that she'd change her name to Grover, earning her the reputation within the family as a joker.
 Time went on, and Clover lost interest
Strengths (Including Personality and Academic):  Smart, Gentle, Patient, Excels at Herbology and Potions, eventually Care of Magical Creatures
Weaknesses (Including Personality and Academic):  Stubborn, Easily Embarrassed, Shy, Needs improvement in Astronomy and History of Magic since she is more of a hands on, let's-do-some-magic! type.
What House You Feel Your Character Belongs In and Why: Um, well, I think Clover should be in Ravenclaw, because, I took many personality tests for her (and myself), and a majority said Ravenclaw. Clover, I fell, is also very clever, and a quick thinker.

[Sue]

Hi and welcome to HPRPG

Before we can go any further, I'll need you to go ahead and take that image out of your sheet, and also remove all that bold formatting. All of our sheets are formatted the same way here to keep it easy to read and reference. You can bold the headings (First and last name, etc) but the rest needs to be left alone.

Once you've made your edits, please switch your subject line from 'pending' to 'edited' so someone can come and have another look~

[Jayce]

Hi there! Thank you for fixing the formatting. Now onto your sheet!

We require at least a solid 2-3 paragraphs for the History, so please try and add more to what you currently have. In addition, I just want to clear some things up about her blood status as well as her family's. If her mother is a pureblood squib, then that would make Lucia a pureblood. If her mother is a half-blood squib, then you have Lucia's blood status correct. I'm not sure why her younger sister is a muggle though? She should be the same blood status as Lucia if they are biological siblings.

You also have some good characteristics listed for Lucia's strengths and weaknesses but unfortunately that's all that it is right now, a list. Please edit this into a paragraph form my expanding on each of the points and how it relates to Lucia.

Once you've done that, just swap your title again!

[Jayce]

As it's been over two weeks since we've last asked you to make changes, I'm going to deny this character sheet for now. Please feel free to post your sheet again at a later date with the requested changes!