Author Topic: Draven Hamilton - Approved [R]  (Read 520 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Draven Hamilton

Draven Hamilton - Approved [R]
« on: 30 Sep 2011, 02:48 pm »
First and Last Name: Draven Hamilton

Bloodline: Halfblood
Hair Color: Dark brown, almost black.
Eye Color: Dark Brown, almost black, like her hair.
General Build: Average
Height: Average

Birthplace: London, England
Brief Childhood History: She was born in poverty, but she was born naturally intelligent. Her father left her and her mother when Draven was only three. Her mother feared she would be made fun of in regular school, so she was home schooled instead. When she wasn't at home, learning, she would be in the park. When she went to the park, she would read or write. She studied everything, may it be math or the history of mustard.

She only had one friend, Rachel. While Draven and Rachel were driving to the store one day, there was a crash. Draven and her mother survived, but Rachel didn't. Draven blames herself for the death of her.  

Years went by, and Draven learned she was a witch. She learned everything she could about magic, and became very smart for someone who wasn't at a magic school. The memory of Rachel was always on her shoulders, and she felt she needed to do something for her. Draven's only hobbies were reading, writing, and studying.

Eventually, she got her letter to Hogwarts. When Draven went to Diagon Alley, she got all she needed. Her wand was ten inches, made of African mahogany and the core was unicorn hair. She got a pet owl named Moon. Moon quickly became Draven's best friend.  

Strengths (Including Personality and Academic): She's very intelligent and quick-witted. Her best subjects are transfiguration, potions, and charms. She can keep a secret, which she always does when she hides her dark past. Draven uses her brains to help her do lots of things.
Weaknesses (Including Personality and Academic): She is very protective and secretive about her past because she doesn't want people to judge her and her family. She can't defend herself as well as some people, but she's still good. She practices self-defense a lot because she wants to protect herself from people who wouldn't like her. She very bad at Quidditch and riding on brooms. Her worst subjects are Herbology and History of Magic.
What House You Feel Your Character Belongs In and Why: I think Draven belongs in Ravenclaw because she's very intelligent and loves learning.
« Last Edit: 03 Oct 2011, 05:29 pm by Tany »


✲ Lift my arms out wide... I open my eyes... Now all I want to see is a sky full of lighters... A sky full of lighters.


Set made by me! :3

Offline Tany

Re: Draven Hamilton
« Reply #1 on: 30 Sep 2011, 05:12 pm »
Heya Draven and welcome to HPRPG~!

However, before we can sort you, there are a few things that need expanding. ^^ First, just a small thing, but could you remove the smiley. ;3 Second, her history: we get the basic outline of Draven's childhood, but I still don't feel like we really know who she is and how she grew up. Did she have any friends, did she do anything for fun other than spend time at the park studying, things like that. Feel free to check out some approved applications for a better grasp of what we're looking for.

Additionally, we need at least three personality strengths and weaknesses and, to keep it from being too list-like, perhaps add in some 'why's to the equation. Why is her ability to keep a secret important to her character? Why is she secretive about her past, why does her inability to defend herself important? Also, make sure you give us some academic weaknesses- the classes she'll do poorly in -like you gave us academic strengths. ;3

Once you've made the above edits just change the title from 'pending'  to 'edited'.

Offline Jayce

Re: Draven Hamilton - Edited
« Reply #2 on: 02 Oct 2011, 08:31 pm »
Thanks you for making the edits but unfortunately, there are still one or two more things to attend to.

Here at HPRPG, we like to keep a light hearted and family-friendly atmosphere, so if you could take out the mention of suicide, that would be greatly appreciated. You will also need to provide us with one or two academic weaknesses for Draven.

Once you've done that, just swap your title again!

Colby Lovell | Madoc Kruszewski

Offline Tany

Re: Draven Hamilton - Edited
« Reply #3 on: 03 Oct 2011, 05:28 pm »
:approvedr: