Topic: Skylar Yoshioko - Approved [S]

[Skylar Yoshioko]

First and Last Name: Skylar Kimeko Yoshioko
Bloodline: Pure Blood
Hair Color:brown
Eye Color: Brown
General Build: Petite
Height: Short
Birthplace: Cambridge England



Brief Childhood History:
          
Skylar was born July second and raised in Cambridge England, to the parents
of Nicole and Akio Yoshioko. Skylar is half British and half Japanese and she is named after her grandmother on her mother's side, since it was the only name her parents could agree on. Skylar grew up in a very rich pure blood family. Being an only child, and what her family considered a miracle child after many miscarriages she was spoiled rotten. If she asked her parents for it she got it, even if they said no, Skylar would still get it after she through a temper tantrum.


Skylars parents hired a Nana for her who taught her the basics of reading, writing, math and demonstrated basic spells for Skylar. Skylars Nana also demonstrated to her basic potions witch Skylar thought was the best thing ever. When Skylar turned six her parents got her a toy broom for her birthday. A month latter Skylar fell off and broke her leg. She refused ever since then to get on a broom. Skylar was also very mischievous she loved playing tricks on her Nana who in turn quiet when Skylar turned eight. Skylars parents hired a new Nana, no matter how many tricks Skylar played she could never get past her new Nana and in a few months became very close to her. Skylars new Nana demonstrated many spells and potions to her witch made her even more interested in the subject.    


Skylar only had a few friends where she grew up, and she was the boss of them all. She loved torturing the boys that lived near her. Every December Skylar would go to  Japan to visit relatives. While she was in Japan, Skylar met her closest friend, Ayame, who she consistently owls when she goes back to England. Skylar got her letter for Hogwarts witch made her parents get into a huge fight about her education. Skylars father wanted her to attend a well known School in Japan, but her mother insists she go to Hogwarts like her family. Skylars parents decided to ask  her what school she would rather go to, she chose Hogwarts, since her best friend would not be going to the same school she would go to in Japan. Now Skylar is hoping to make her parent's proud especially her father.




Strengths:
Skylar has a very witty personality she is cute, adorable and loved by many. Skylar has a way of charming people into getting what she wants when she wants it. She is also has a lot of determination, she won't let anything stop her from getting her way not even her parents can stop her. Skylar is amazing in potion she loves the idea of mixing different ingredients to make up new potions even if they cause explosions. Skylar also has a fascination with charms Skylar, thinks that being able to wave a wand and make things appear, diaper or anything is quite amazing.

Weaknesses
Skylar is a brat and very blunt. She can be very mean and almost threatening at times. She is sneaky and plain out evil. Skylar thinks she is the best of the best and that no one can bring her down. Basically, don't ever trust her cute smiley face; it's the face of evil. Though Skylar refuses to acknowledge her weakness, she is horrible at Transfiguration. It would have to be down right her worst subject. She is also horrible at Herbology. She is not a fan of anything that could get her dirty. Skylar believes digging up plants is beneath her and for some one else to do.
 
 
 What House You Feel Your Character Belongs In and Why:
      I think Skylar belongs to Slytherin because she is very cunning, ambitious, and has a lot of determination. She also is a strong willed and loves to be the leader. She refuses to ever follow behind any ones foot steps and believes in making her own foot steps for others to follow.

[Tany]

Heya Skylar and welcome to HPRPG~!

However, before we can sort you, I'm going to have to ask you to go back and check your punctuation. ^^ Your sentences are a bit difficult to read without commas and the like, so it'd be great if you could fix that.

Once you've done that just change the title from 'pending' to 'edited' and we'll continue from there. <3

[Sue]

Hi again. Just a few things I need you to fix, and you'll hopefully be on your way.

There are still several grammar and spelling errors throughout your sheet, so I'm going to have to ask that you go back through and proofread, making sure you're using the proper tense, capitalization, and spelling for words and such~. (For example, '2end' would actually be spelled '2nd,' and words like 'father' and 'friend' do not need capitalization) The reason we're particular about these things is that the role play is text based. It's very frustrating to read through and try to respond to a post that's difficult to read and understand.  So we like to make sure you're off to a good start by catching most of your grammatical errors in your character sheet. And you do not need to indent your paragraphs, but make sure they're double spaced for ease of reading.

Also, and this is just a clarification since it was a bit unclear, magical children are not allowed to do any magic outside of school, even basic spells. Skylar's nanny would have been able to demonstrate magic for her, but Skylar wouldn't be able to actually do any spells or brew any potions herself. If you could just clarify that in your sheet, that would be great.

And could you please give us a bit more detail about why Skylar should be a Slytherin? Contrary to popular belief, 'mean' and 'bratty' are not traits that make someone a Slytherin.  The bit about cunning works, but I do need you to give us some more details about how her personality suits Slytherin house.

When you've finished your edits, you can change your subject line again. 

[Tany]

Thank you for editing!

Mind, there are still a few instances where you've capitalized nouns, so make sure you're reading over your application carefully when checking for these. (And maybe run it through spell-check again?) ^^ <3

You're nearly there, though! The application is looking good. Just two tiny things in addition to fixing all the unnecesary capitalization: could you remove the titles separating the personality strengths from the academic strengths (same with weakneses), as it should just be one full paragraph, aaaand remove the indentions at the beginning of your paragraphs. Just a simple double space between them is enough.

You know the drill- change the title when you're ready!

[Jayce]

Hello!

I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to go back once again and double check all your grammar and punctuation. Like Sue said, we are a text-based site and without proper grammar, punctuation, and spelling, people may have a hard time understanding posts. I've taken the liberty of helping you edit a portion of the sheet to make it easier for you to spot the errors. There are still a few more within the application though. And if English is not your first language, go ahead and let us know since it would help us understand and we are always more than willing to help.

Skylar is a brat and very blunt. She can be very mean and almost threatening at times. She is sneaky and plain out evil. Skylar thinks she is the best of the best and that no one can bring her down. Basically, don't ever trust her cute smiley face; it's the face of evil. Though Skylar refuses to acknowledge her weakness, she is horrible at Transfiguration. It would have to be down right her worst subject. She is also horrible at Herbology. She is not a fan of anything that could get her dirty. and digging up plants Skylar believes digging up plants is beneath her and for some one else to do.

Once again, just swap the title when you're done. 

[Sue]

Just one more thing. 

There's nothing in the books that describes any schools for witches and wizards to attend before Hogwarts (or Durmstrang or wherever they go), so it's not really canon to say she attended a magical school in Japan before Hogwarts. Remember that she needs to be born AND raised in the United Kingdom, so she would have to have spent most of her time in England. So, if you could change that, and remove the bit about the school, hopefully we can get you sorted. 

[Tany]